Weird things always seem to happen to me. Well, that sounds silly. Weird things happen to me because I have three little kids. The chances of me experiencing something out of the ordinary are high.
However, when I go through one of these experiences, it always takes me a few days (or weeks) to get over it. Like with poopmegadon. I just need some time to process these things before I share them. That brings me to today. I have two stories. Both of which occurred on the same day. Both also involved the SAME child.
Ever since I had Maddox, trips to Payson just don't seem to occur as frequently. We love to go down to G-Ma's and play. Who wouldn't? She feeds my kids never ending treats and there's a trampoline and a swingset. To my kids, it's just short of Disneyland.
Last Thursday, I had a hair appointment. I still get my hair done in Payson. It's just convenient because G-Ma is there and I love the girl who does my hair. When we go to Payson, I like to leave early so that by the time we get there, it's time for lunch and naps. This morning, however, wasn't going well. Holynd was refusing to do everything. She didn't want to eat breakfast, she didn't want to get dressed... It was just a fight straight out of the gates. I finally told her that if she didn't eat her breakfast she would just go hungry. (GASP!) So, I finished getting everyone ready and put everyone in the car.
Now, my girls do have a history of motion sickness. I usually give them snacks to eat on the way to G-Ma's because it is a little bit of a drive and they've gotten sick before. BUT! On this particular morning, I was not about to give Holynd snacks! She didn't eat her breakfast, so she wasn't going to get a snack. (GASP AGAIN!) Plus, what are the chances that this ONE time I don't give her a snack she gets sick? Turns out high!
I'm sure everyone has noticed how lovely I-15 has been lately. This morning was no different. Right around Pleasant Grove they had the freeway cut down to 2 lanes. It was bumper to bumper and very frustrating. Holynd had started to whine, but again, I was pretty much at the end of the my rope with her, so I was, well, ignoring her. (TRIPLE GASP!) All the sudden, she starts to gag. "I'm throwing up! I'm throwing up!" she cried. I turned around and there she was, puking all over everything.
Lovely.
To top the whole thing off, I was stuck, Stuck, STUCK.
I said a tiny little prayer that included the words, "You have got to be kidding me". I'm not sure how that went over in heaven. But heaven wasn't too upset because, miraculously, I found an opening and was able to exit the freeway.
I ended up stripping Holynd down in the commuter parking lot off of 1600 North in Orem. I'm sure everyone at the crowded interesection was wondering what the crap was going on.
I managed to clean up the mess (which wasn't all that bad because she was STARVING) to the best of my ability at that moment and put her in her carseat in nothing but her panties. I climbed back into the drivers seat and did a mental checklist of everyone we had been around lately. My main concern at this point was not the gross smell that was suffocating us, but trying to figure out if it was just car sickness and not the stomach flu.
I kept asking Holynd if she was hungry, hoping that an appetite would prove that it was car sickness. I finally decided to grab some Happy Meals and see if she would eat.
After making sure everyone had their allotted fries, apples and chicken nuggets, I called my friend Nicole. We had been with them the day before. "Are your kids sick?! Holynd is throwing up. I'm on my way to Payson and I can't decide if it's the stomach flu or car sickness." Nicole said her kids were fine, so I decided that we could just continue on our way.
About the time that we got back on the freeway, Sloane spilled an entire cup full of sprite all over the backseat. In my panic, I didn't notice that I had drove away before taking it away.
Double lovely.
We arrived in Payson and everything was cleaned and sanitized. The incident was mostly forgotten, except for my guilt for not giving Holynd her snack on the way to Payson.
We spent the entire day playing. I was able to get my hair done and finish some Easter shopping.
End of Story #1. On to Story #2.
By the time I got everyone ready to leave, it was getting late. My mom was nice enough to bath the girls, but I hadn't brought them pajamas, so she just put them in T-Shirts. We were just going home, so I wasn't worried about them. I had even stole a pair of pajama bottoms from my mom to wear home. (I didn't even put shoes on. The shoes I wore down to Payson were my mom's, so I just left them behind.) I figured that we would just pull into the garage, Matt would carry the sleeping kids in and all would be well.
But... No. This is me. Weird things happen to me.
About the time I reached Spanish Fork, Holynd started crying. Thinking that she was sick again, I asked her if it was her stomach. "No" she answered. "I have to pee pee right now Mommy!".
AAAARRRRRGGGGGGGGGG.
"Holynd, you'll just have to pee in your Pull Up"
"NO! It will leak out"
She was right. I've never regretted using Pull Ups at night, but they're still not the greatest. I knew that with the pressure from her sitting in her carseat that if she did go, we'd have a soaking wet car seat and many more problems.
I couldn't figure out what to do. I had all three kids in the car. Sloane and Holynd were in nothing more then T-Shirts, I had pajama bottoms on and no one had shoes on.
Triple lovely.
Another tiny prayer was said and I immediately remembered a gas station bathroom that was outside of the gas station, attached to the car wash in Provo. I pleaded with Holynd to hold it and sped off the exit.
I pulled up to the bathroom and I could already tell that this was going to be disgusting. I got out of the car, barefooted and took Holynd out. I opened the bathroom door to find a huge puddle of water in the center of the bathroom floor. It wouldn't have been all bad had the water not been the color of chocolate milk. Here I am, without shoes and a crying child who practically naked. I held her over the potty, she went and I was able to pull her Pull Up back up without her touching the floor. I then turned to leave. Holynd then said, "I need to wash my hands". I took one look at the sink and said, "Nope! Not in this bathroom!"
I returned to the car to find Maddox and Sloane both screaming, but safe. I buckled Holynd back in and then tore through my purse to find wipes and hand sanitizer.
With all my experiences with poop, this was the first time that I actually thought I was going to throw up.
For the record, I almost always have Holynd go potty before we leave, but there's no way to be perfect. I'm sure all parents know that feeling. As prepared as you always try to be there will inevitably be a situation where you just can't foresee what's in store.
Maybe in a few days I'll be ready to blog about Sloane waking up in horrific hives and me rushing her to the doctor's office. It'll take some time.
