The Luckiest.

I'll be honest.

I didn't always see myself as a stay-at-home mom.

I always thought I'd work. I wanted to graduate and I wanted a career.

While I was pregnant with Sloane, I thought a lot about what I would do after I graduated. I finally just decided that I would do what felt right.

Somedays I'm just a filthy as my kids are at the end of the day.

Today, Sloane walked right up to me and wiped her nose on my pant leg.

Yesterday I spent most of the morning cleaning up a broken casserole dish.

Just an hour ago, I got to clean up the toilet mess after Holynd clogged it with Clorox wipes.

And, I always wonder what people are thinking while they watch me trying to wrangle three kids into the grocery store. I'm sure I look ridiculous yelling at Holynd and Sloane while carrying Maddox on my hip.

A couple of weeks ago, I realized that the thoughts of working outside the home didn't even cross my mind anymore. I found myself wondering why that is. Why, with all the hardships, do I stay at home?

Because.

Because all of these little experiences I get to have with these little beings.

Sometimes, on the hard days. The days when no one listened. The days when everyone cried all day long and Holynd and Sloane fought constantly. The days when a certain child REFUSES to use the potty and the other two don't want to go to bed at night - I look at pictures that I've taken.

And I wonder how I would feel if I wasn't the one being used as a tissue. Or the one cleaning up the bathroom floor for the 10th time that day!

I'd really miss the afternoons I get to spend with Maddox while the sisters are napping.

I can never get enough of those spit bubbles.

I would've missed the day that Holynd decided she wanted to "sleep out under the stars".... in the middle of the day.... on the driveway...

I don't think my life would've been complete without watching Holynd putting a bib on Sloane and feeding her like a baby. "You're still a baby Sloane. You should eat like Maddox!"

How many smiles would I miss?

Lately, I get asked a lot what it's like to have three.

It wasn't as big of a transition as it was bringing Sloane home. Bringing home the second baby was hard just because I had to learn how to split my time. There was more guilt with the second. However, the third child feels like I've graduated into "real" mother mode. I don't see myself as a "new" mom. Now that I've got three, I feel like I'm supposed to know what I'm doing.

I don't. Believe me.

But I do know that I'm pretty lucky to get to stay here with these babies all day.

Toilet messes and all.